Who is He?
by Khushi
Summary: Harry thinks about the one who guided him through the last 8 years of his life.


Disclaimer: The characters belong to J.K. Rowling, not me. This is only a piece of fiction, as in, it's not real.

This was written for one of the 'From Dusk till Dawn Severus Snape/Harry Potter' challenges.

**Who is He?**

The Order of Phoenix were gathered in the sitting room of Harry Potter's manor, _Pacis_ (peace) and the headquarters for the Order. The air was filled with nervous tension as the members assembled waited for Albus Dumbledore to make an appearance. They had been summoned to come there for a meeting that night. It was 20 minutes past 9pm. 20 mins past the time Albus had asked them to meet there.

Harry sighed from his spot by the wall, hoping that Albus showed up soon. Another few minutes and theories and rumours would replace the constantly repeated question of, "What do you think had happened?" which was asked in those annoying stage whispers. _They may as well scream the question out, it's not like everyone can't hear it,_ he thought sarcastically.

Harry sighed in relief as Albus walked into the room. Everyone quickly hushed up and leaned forward eagerly.

"Thank you all for coming. I'll get right to the point. Our spy has managed to send information to me about an opportunity that came his way. He had the chance to give Voldemort," Harry rolled his eyes as several people flinched. _Honestly_, he thought, _when would they learn_. Albus turned his gaze on Harry, his eyes twinkling, "as I was saying, the chance to give Voldemort, a potion. From what I could decipher, it makes whoever ingests it, in this case Voldemort, sensitive to emotions. Those of his own and to an extent of those around him. I do not know more than this at the moment. We have received more information about future raids that have been planned by the Death Eater's. Also Voldemort suspected two Death Eaters from his inner circle as being spies and has killed them.

The moment Albus finished speaking, people began speaking to him and questioning him while surrounding him.

Harry sighed and rested his head back against the wall, focusing on his thoughts and ignoring the loud chatter in the room. Their spy. _No one other than Albus knew the identity of this man. All we did know was that he was a part of Voldemort's inner circle and a man. The British wizarding would wouldn't be as prepared as we are if it hadn't been for all the information we had received through this man._

_**He**__ had helped me a lot for which I would always be grateful to him. He had informed Albus about the way my so called family treated me. Within 2 months of being left at their doorstep Albus came and took me back, becoming my guardian. Blood protection or not, he said he agreed with their spy that I didn't deserve to be raised in that environment._

_In my first year as a Hogwarts student __**He**__ reached word to Albus that Voldemort's spirit was after the Stone. __**He**__ asked a lot of the forest creatures to watch over me if I wandered into their midst. They don't disclose his name to me. They've kept him a secret from me for 8 years. _

_In my second year he told Fawkes to bring the Sorting Hat to me. __**He**__ had more faith in me than I did in myself._

_In my third year __**He **__was strangely silent… at least to me. I'm still not sure if __**He **__stayed in contact with Albus. Albus had looked a bit strained all year. Though I did receive a firebolt that year and I am sure it was sent by __**Him**__. It was also the year I met and freed my godfather, Sirius Black. It had been an emotionally confusing year. I still don't know why Remus had kept Sirius a secret from me. I felt I should have been told if not before, then at least when Sirius escaped from Azkaban, that he was my godfather._

_My fourth year… the Triwizard tournament came to Hogwarts. And yet another Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, who we thought was Mad Eye Moody. He did help me that year by giving me the best advice in the circumstances. 'Don't trust anyone, not even your shadow. Use others as they use you.' When I touched the portkey that took me to the graveyard with Cedric, I gathered my wits about me quickly and told Cedric we had to get back to the cup. But Cedric wasn't fast enough. When Voldemort told Wormtail to 'Kill the spare,' I did the only thing I think of doing at the time and pushed Cedric onto the cup. I crossed my fingers in hope that he made it back safely to Hogwarts, and then turned to face my fate._

_Two things danced through my mind as I watched Pettigrew perform the spell. Voldemort was back and that I hoped __**He **__would forgive me for my Gryffindorish behavior in asking Cedric to take the cup with me and then pushing him onto it, knowing that I would get left behind._

_When Voldemort called his inner circle Death Eaters to him and began taking their masks off, I wondered and tried to figure out if __**He**__ was among them. It didn't seem like it to me but I knew he had to be a part of the inner circle. After Malfoy sank to his knees, Voldemort laughed and said only one had remained loyal to him._

_As he finished speaking, a man clad in the same black robes as the other Death Eaters appeared right next to Voldemort. His face was shadowed in darkness. He turned and bowed to Voldemort, who put his hand on the man's shoulder and made him straighten up. As the man turned to the other Death Eaters, they immediately bowed low as a sign on respect. _

_Voldemort, probably eager to show off, made me duel with him. When our wands connected and I saw my parents I didn't know what to do. They told me they'd hold Voldemort off to give me some time. But time for what? I wanted to ask them. Where do I go? How do I go? Where do I hide from them? It's not like I could hide around Riddle's house anywhere. Before I could ask, our wands separated. I saw something being thrown in my direction and with a seeker's instinct I turned and caught it. A portkey._

_After dealing with the whole fiasco of Mad Eye Moody, I thought to look at what the portkey was. A sapphire star. Albus just smiled when he saw it. I knew then that I had been SO close to **him**. It was unfortunate that I still didn't know who __**He**__ was. Rather, I wasn't sure if __**He**__ was who I thought __**He**__ was. _

_I wear the star around my neck, safeguarding it until the day I can return it to __**Him**__, because I know it must be precious to __**Him**__ since __**He**__ had it on in the graveyard that night._

_My fifth year was a disaster from start to finish. The only good thing that came out of it was that Sirius was saved in the Department of Mysteries and Peter Pettigrew was captured by the Order.__ He confessed to a lot under Veritaserum in front of the Aurors. __**He**__ was the reason he was captured. I just know it._

_My sixth year brought more involvement from __**Him**__. __**He**__ corresponded with me for the first time. It was just a few sentences in the letters __**He**__ sent to Albus, but those words were for me and me alone. It made me feel like __**He**__ was anchoring me with those words. All year long Sirius tried to get me to relax and have fun but I couldn't. Something kept stopping me, forcing me to be cautious. __**Him**__. _

_My 17__th__ birthday was special indeed. __**He**__ corresponded with me directly for the first time. I still have that letter hidden away. I remember every word. 'Harry, your parents sacrificed themselves to save you. Don't put their sacrifice in danger by engaging in trivial pursuits with your godfather. I know it's tempting, he's finally a free man and wants to see you enjoying yourself, but you know why you shouldn't. There will be plenty of time to do anything you want to once these dark times are over. And they will be over Harry. Trust me. Use your parents love for you to anchor yourself when temptation comes knocking on your door. Happy Birthday Harry.'_

_**His**__ letter calmed me and helped me to not only resist Sirius's attempts at making me live a somewhat normal teenage life but also helped me to get him to settle down by explaining to him how much he means to me and how I don't want to lose him on a chance to have fun. _

_**He**__ became my anchor, not my parents._

_And now, here I sit cold with relief at finally getting some word from __**Him**__. This was the first time __**He**__ had made contact in three months. _

_Three months of me panicking silently more and more each day that went by with no word from __**Him**__. Had __**He**__ been discovered? I wanted answers. What exactly had happened to have kept __**Him **__silent for three whole months? 92 days. I hope I do get some answers soon. I felt like I was going to explode if Albus didn't give me more information about what had happened to __**Him**__._

Taking a few deep breaths, Harry stood up and strode over to where Albus stood surrounded by most of the Order. Standing on the outskirts of the group, Harry yelled out, "**ALBUS**!"

Everybody's head whipped around to look at Harry who smiled sweetly, "Albus, may I have a word in private? I need to leave soon."

Excusing themselves, Albus and Harry went into a smaller sitting room. Harry absently placed locking, silencing and anti spying spells on the room. Albus sat down on the couch and waited until Harry sat beside him before holding up his hand to forestall his questions.

"I will tell you all I know," Albus said. When Harry arched his eyebrows, he added, "I promise."

Both of them smiled. It was a code word between them. While growing up Harry realized that Albus had needed to conceal things from him and the same as he had to from Albus. But whenever they said 'I promise,' it was a way of telling the other that they knew it was an important issue and they were going to tell the other the absolute truth and all they knew.

Albus took Harry's hand in his own and patted it. He began speaking while looking into Harry's eyes. "He has been discovered." Harry gasped, tightening his grip on Albus's hand. Albus quickly continued before Harry could begin to all out panic. He admitted to himself that his young charge was never rational where their spy was concerned.

"He was discovered by has been mixing a potion into Voldemort's drinks and potions. He didn't explain to me what exactly it does, other than what I told everyone else, just that it is worth the risk he has taken in giving it to Voldemort." Albus paused before continuing, "He communicated with me very briefly and wasn't able to say much more. He is somewhere safe now."

Harry immediately began speaking, "Where is he now? Do you know? Is he hurt?" Harry didn't bother asking if **He **would come to them. After getting uncertain answers for so many years, he had stopped asking if he would ever be able to meet the man he was more than a little bit in love with.

Albus smiled and patted Harry's hand. "I do not know where he is right now. He didn't say. Nor do I know if he is hurt." On seeing Harry's sad expression, he smiled, "**He **will answer these questions and probably any other you have soon though."

Harry looked at Albus, "How soon? You're sure he'll get in touch with you again soon?" He looked at Albus suspiciously, "**He **doesn't say he will be in touch soon. He's never done that before. You aren't just saying that to make me feel better are you? You promised Albus!"

Albus smiled, "I suspect he said he'll be in touch soon because I told him how worried we've been about him… especially you."

Harry blushed, "Albus! You didn't!"

Albus chuckled at Harry's blush, "Harry…"

Harry looked back into Albus's eyes on hearing the serious tone of his voice, "The Order will have a new official member soon."

Harry gasped as he let his heart believe what Albus was telling him. He sat back against the couch in shock. He would finally get to meet the man he had been waiting to meet for practically most of his life. "How much longer do I have to wait to find out his name?" he asked softly.

Albus smiled, "It won't be long before he will come to us because if I am not wrong, **His **message reached us a little later than expected. There is a fair chance that may just apparate here rather than come to Hogwarts."

Harry smiled. Only three people could apparate directly into the manor. Harry himself, Albus and their spy. Harry had insisted on it so that if **He **ever needed a safe place in a hurry, he could come there… come home. Harry had spent 2 years examining and learning **His **magical signature as much as was possible and felt quite confident if and when **He **came to Pacis, Harry would be able to tell who he was. Breathing a sigh of relief, Harry closed his eyes and let his head rest back against the couch.

Albus let Harry sit quietly for a few minutes before patting his shoulder, "I'd better get back out there. I'm sure I need to answer the same questions that are put to me by each person differently a few more times than I already have before they are satisfied."

Harry opened his eyes and smiled, "You have a lot of patience Albus. It always amazes me."

Albus chuckled and stood up, walking towards the door. Harry took down the charms on the room so that Albus could leave. Standing up, Harry left the room too and went to his bedroom, wanting and needing to avoid everyone.

Three weeks later, Harry got his first look at the man he had wanted to find out as much as he could about. The man who fascinated him. The man he had placed on a pedestal that was equal to if not higher than the one he had Albus up on.

Albus sat near the fireplace in the sitting room at Pacis while Harry paced around the room, his eyes straying every few minutes to the clock.

Coal black hair, pale delicate looking skin, midnight blue eyes, with pink lips that Harry just knew would be as soft to touch as they looked. The blue eyes flickered over him before focusing on Albus who stood up and held open his arms for **Him**. After a slight bit of hesitation **He **slowly walked forward and into Albus's arms and embrace.

Slowly they pulled away and Albus turned to Harry. "Harry, I'd like you to meet my grandson, Severus Snape."


End file.
